Obituaries

 Passed away....

  Well, of course

   - assuming no intent to deceive.

  Passed away peacefully...

  Possibly. It does occur.

  But eight times out of ten?

  Slipped the bonds of earth.

  Arguably, at least as metaphor.

  But literally untrue unless they left by rocket.

  Received her angel wings.

  Presumably not the ones pilots wear.

  And sans certification or formal training.

  It is with deep sorrow we announce....

  Makes me think someone is protesting too much.

  Besides, having left all pain behind, why not with joy?

  After a long struggle....

  Often true. Often obvious. But nonetheless

  my own critics' choice award favorite.